Easter Day

I never posted about the other half of our Easter day since I was totally MIA this week. Aunt Zippy was in town for her spring break and we were busy having fun doing a whole lot of nothing. Wyatt was completely infatuated with her and while it was super cute, I was totally jealous. We think he's in love.

Anyway, I didn't get to post the last of our Easter pictures. We spent Easter day with my parents and grilled out and played with the kids. I definately think that since I've had kids, it is my second favorite holiday next to Christmas!

Easter Egg Hunt

Easter morning was fun! The kids totally loved their Easter baskets and playing with the Easter eggs. It was so cute seeing them start to get excited over getting new stuff. Anyway, we had to get them ready pretty early for an Easter egg hunt with our friends Dan and Catherine and their daughter, Emma. I couldn't believe we actually made it out the door on time. I don't think we have ever been able to do that since we had the babes.

Catherine's mom was so cute and had made a really big deal about the Easter Egg hunt. She hid tons of eggs and stuffed animals and little toys and things. Callie was more interested in walking on the shell path than anything else and Wyatt just sat in the grass the whole time fake laughing really loudly with his one green egg. Poor little Emma tried to help Callie find the hidden eggs, but Callie had a mind of her own and enjoyed being outside more than she cared about the stupid eggs. It was really cute and so fun to be able to spend time with them. Her cute mom made a really big brunch for everyone and her sweet dad was passing out booze the second we walked through the door. We had a really good time!

Easter Morning

Go figure.

Callie took a dump in the bathtub today.

Someone upstairs has a good sense of humor!

First, I tried not to cry. Then, I fished it out with the litter box scooper, drained the water, and scolded Callie for reading the blog. I just could not believe it!

In addition, I decided to brave the crowds to go get some last minute Easter stuff for the kids. Nothing says "Praise Jesus" like getting a good elbow to the rib cage over the last Easter basket.

But we did get a happy surprise in the mail today! Callie and Wyatt got a care package from their cousins full of fun treats and some cards. It was really nice and totally made our day! Thanks Trevor and Aaron! Here are some cute pictures of the twinados digging into the loot!

It happened.

The kids ate the freaking cat food yesterday. I had been waiting for it to happen for months now. I was cleaning dishes and normally always remember to shut the laundry room door so they can play in the kitchen while I'm in there too. All of a sudden, I realized the kids had been suspiciously quiet for a little tooooo long and my stomach sank as I knew in my gut what they were up to. Sure enough... both of them were elbows deep in cat food and contently crunching and crunching away. I had to fight them to get that crap out of their cheeks and out of their tightly clutched fists. I was seriously on the edge of puking.

Go figure that the turdlettes won't eat their vegetables but they'll eat that stuff! Pew!

Now I'm just waiting for one of them to take a dump in the bathtub.

Also, Callie sat on Wyatt's head today because he wouldn't give her back her toy. I hope she pulls that same move when she's a teenager and some boy tries to kiss her.

So, it's been Wyatt's turn to assume the freakazoid crown. His new thing is fake laughing. If anyone is laughing within his earshot, the kid busts out with the fakest laugh ever. When we try to include him in whatever is making us laugh, he doesn't seem to find it funny at all. He's social laughing only. Heaven forbid we actually try and make him laugh for real because he doesn't know what to do and gets annoyed that we interrupted him from his fake laughing.

Our little Muslim

Here's a little clip of him walking last night.

Anyone know a good dentist?

I went to the dentist yesterday which, for me, is exactly like voluntary torture. I loathe the dentist. It always hurts and it's never good news. And, lucky me, I get the added bonus of inheriting bad teeth. I never have cavities... but I do have bone loss which means I have to go every six months. I get close to tears every time I sit in the chair because I feel like he's going to yell at me and tell me I need dentures. He always tells me that I'm ridiculous and am not remotely close to that possibility, but I'm phobic nonetheless. I like my teeth and would like to keep them as long as possible. (At least, until they can invent some alternative to dentures which to me seems like a big Lee-press-on-nail that doesn't want to stay pressed.) It turns my stomach just thinking about it.

Anyway, I totally hate the dentist and get shaky hands and sweaty palms and stress headaches just because it's literally torture to me. Not only do I have extremely sensitive gums, but the grinding and squealing of all those instruments just adds a perfect soundtrack to the dental "cleaning" torture that is my hell. Plus, I'm probably a big baby. So, I like to make sure that these people know that I need laughing gas and numbing topical before I get there! And I need to start inhaling that crap the second I get in the chair... before that dentist dude gets within 10 feet of me!

So there I was yesterday feeling high as hell and inhaling as deep as I could, while telling these people that I didn't think it was on high enough so that they would crank that mo' fo' way up. Which they did and I felt even more tingly and lovely.

Before we began I let the lady know that I felt like I was drinking alone. (In hindsight, this seems like fair warning.)

So the lady starts swabbing that numbing topical all over my gums while I began embarrassing myself. She said, "I'm sorry this tastes so bad." and I said, "I would let you rub your butt on my face if you told me it would numb my gums." Then I laughed. Really hard. And she didn't.

I told her that although I really loved her, I thought the actual dentist office was a dump and that I would never recommend it to my friends. (How unbelievably rude! Who says that!?!?!?)

Then, I gained control of the spit vacuum! I was using it every 2 seconds because I loved sucking out the spit myself way too much and she had to keep scolding me because I wouldn't stop! She had to keep taking it away from me over and over again. But I didn't care. I fought to hold it.

Also, she confided in me that she was having fertility issues and that the doctor's think she might be pre-menopausal. Know what I did? I died laughing!!!!

(Obviously, I don't think fertility issues are funny.)

So she says, "You think that's funny?" And I said "Oh God No!" but I left it at that because I didn't know how to explain to her that I laughed because at that very moment, I felt like a pair of parenthesis.

PARENTHESIS!!!!

Don't ask because I have no clue!

That laughing gas... It's some good sh*t! But seriously, I'm soooo changing dentists. I'm red in the face right now just reliving my mortifying behavior!

The worst part was at the very end when she told me she had a migraine and was going to leave work early because she felt so debilitated. A freaking migraine! I never shut up once! Can you imagine!?!?! At this point I was only inhaling oxygen and was becoming more and more aware of what an ass I had been! I apologized to her profusely and felt really terrible because I probably put her over the edge with my shenanigans. I totally blow myself away and now I need to find a new dentist.

Easter - Round 1

We celebrated Easter this past Sunday with my mom and dad, grandmother, and aunt and uncle. It was the only time that we were all able to get together as a family. It was good to see everyone and really such a blessing that we all live so close to each other now.

Parade Pictures

Happy St. Patrick's Day fo' real today y'all! Here are some pictures from the parade. I'm posting this first picture just so you all know that I tried to do something with her hair. She ripped out her bows as soon as we got in the car and then she just looked crazy. Uncle Binky brought these jackets back from Ireland the last time he came to visit.

Happy St. Patrick's Day!

Today we went to the St. Patrick's Day Parade in Savannah. So in honor, I'm going to write in all green. We were excited that the kids might actually enjoy the parade this year since they are much more coherent then they were last year, but not so much. We of course, walked up to enjoy the parade right at the time the civil war reenactor people decided to fire their muskets into the air. Wyatt was not a fan! He poked out his bottom lip sooooo far you would have thought he was begging for change! So instead, we decided to hit River Street while most people were at the parade and it wasn't going to be too crowded. It was a lot of fun! There was tons of food, lots of drunk people, lots of beads, and green beer. The kids got really tired pretty quick and they let us know when it was time to go. By the time we got back to the car, they were out.

The coolest part of the day was seeing Paula Deen's sons, Bobby and Jamie. Jamie's wife and son happened to be there too. And, to let you in on a not so cool secret of mine, I'm a total Food Network fan. (I can't believe I just admitted that.) Bobby just happened to be watching the parade right next to us and ended up leaving the same time we did. As we walked away, he met up with his brother Jamie and his family. It was really cute. My mom actually got a picture of Bobby by complete accident when we were standing at the parade that we found after we got home. I have tons of other pictures from today that I'll post later.

Left circle: (Bobby Deen)

Right Circle: (Lady and Sons - Paula's Restaurant)

Feline Fresh Market

So, we have moved on from carpet fur balls to cat hair plucked fresh from the cat. Callie is now chasing down the cat, ripping out a huge chunk, and then feasting. I guess that "the fresher, the better" rule also applies to fur.

This week she has started running and twirling. She's such a girl! I have to say, that the twirling is the cutest thing I've seen yet. It's a dance move. She looks like a little drunken sailorette when she's pivoting. I want to die from the molten cuteness that pours from that little spirit.

I feel like I haven't talked too much about Wyatt lately, but he's been hurting and cranky with his teething. Poor little man has such a hard time with cutting his teeth! He yanks and rips on his ears until they are bleeding. I already feel like we give him too much Tylenol, but the fact of the matter is... he needs a Tylenol IV.

The little monkey is climbing. He can get on top of the coffee table and the couches by himself. He can get down too. He also likes to climb into his toy bucket but when realizes he can't get out, he screams bloody murder until one of us comes to rescue him.

His walking is improving. (Kinda.) The will is there for sure! He takes a step or two and completely face plants onto the floor. The worst part is, he does this regardless of whether we are around to catch him or not. I am so scared that he is going to knock out his front teeth and will look like a hockey goalie until his big people teeth come in. Such a little boy!

Bath time...

This weekend was so great because I got to take the day off and go up to Charleston to hang out with Ape for the day. It was really hard leaving the kids, but once I was on the road, I was fine. I didn't start missing them until about 3 in the afternoon either, which I thought was pretty good. Once it hit me though, I couldn't get home fast enough!

Ape and I spent the day shopping and eating and being dorks. We went to Poe's Tavern on Sullivan's Island which is this really fun loud bar that serves the best burgers ever! I might have even felt normal for a split second during lunch. (And by normal I mean, someone without a kid on each hip.) We shopped til we dropped and of course I only bought stuff for the kids even though I had full intentions on finally trying to focus on shopping for myself for once. Coming home and seeing the runts though was the best! I felt like I could breathe again!

That is, of course, until Cal waddled over to me and gave me a big welcome home hug with a huge load in her pants. Then I couldn't breathe anymore.

Wacko!

Seriously. When I told you that Cal was off her rocker, I meant it. Yesterday she discovered her gag reflex and thought it was funny as hell. She just kept shoving her hand in the back of her mouth and gagging. Then she would belly laugh as her eyes filled up with tears and immediately, she was at it again. I died! I tried to get her to quit by pulling her hand out of her mouth, but the fact that I was nervously laughing too much probably just egged her on. I ended up arm wrestling the kid to no avail. Finally, I gave in and let her gag away. She is so crazy! No doubt that this child is my kid!

The Twincess Is Rotten!

Cal is totally off her rocker! Tonight, she was pulling herself up on our headboard and would lean back doing a complete blind free fall onto the bed and would die laughing! Our jaws just dropped to the floor and we nervously laughed in amazement at first but the stinker kept doing it over and over and over until we were all three doubled over laughing at the screw loose inside her head! (Even imagining it again now, still blows me away!)

Also, she scavenges the carpet and furniture and floors for any possible lint or fur she can snack on. She is a carpet fiber and cat hair connoisseur. We fight her all the time to get her to spit out her treasure but it's pretty much worthless. Apparently, they are darn good eats... good enough in fact to throw temper-tantrums in order to avoid spitting them out.

She's still 90% sweetness and only about 10% rotten, but it's like fighting a losing battle because Miss Thang is starting to get some big britches!

My Nuggets

The monkey... he walks.

Wyatt took his first steps today! They were completely sloppy but he took three steps in a row with Brent's encouragement. I completely understand 'second child syndrome' because I only barely remembered to grab the camera at the last second. I felt bad. Based on Callie's walking development pattern, I still say the the booger has got at least a month before he's walking like she is. It took me 16 months to walk so as long as he beats that, we'll be happy.

We ran around all day long doing dumb stuff just because the weather was so pretty. It seemed like everyone else had the same idea because there were so many people out riding bikes and shopping and dorking off. Here are some pictures we took at the park today. It was fun.

Bring On Spring!

I've been in one of those blogging funks. I think it's because I'm in a funk myself. I had pretty severe cabin fever and I think it's because for most of the week, it was absolutely beautiful outside! But, the second you opened up the door, it was still very cold. Also, I got drop-kicked by massive migraine on Friday which put me totally out of commission.

Yesterday though... it was spring! It was gorgeous and in the mid 70s. We took the kids outside for awhile to play in the yard and also ran some errands. Today is supposed to be even nicer. I hope it stays like this!

Moving on... Let me think what is going on in runt news. Umm. Callie has become a toddling pro and is actually walking way more than she is crawling. She's starting to haul buggy too! Her new found independence has given her a little bit of stank in her attitude though. I saw a tiny glimpse of the terrible twos coming in her and I'm scared. She is realizing more and more that she is her own person and doesn't necessarily have to do what I say. We will ask her to do something and she will purposefully walk away from us. Also this week, she told me no! I was asking her to spit out whatever foreign object she had found that she was chewing on and she violently shook her head 'no' and tried to walk away from me. Not good.

Poor thing has an attitude adjustment coming to her.

Monkey is good. He said "again" this week and has managed to keep it in his vocabulary too. 'Bye-bye' came and went like a fart in the wind. The only things that have stuck are 'momma' and 'again'. What an odd choice of second word too learn! But that's monkey. He's quirky. I love it! Both kids (but especially Wyatt) have been completely and utterly obsessed with ceiling fans and lights. I mean, all they do is point to fans and lights. It's so weird. So, when they point, that's my cue to say "Fan!", and then monkey says, "Geen!" (again). Same thing with the lights. They play that dumb game all day, everyday.

When I turned the kitchen light on and off using the switch, I blew their minds!

Girlfriend's hair is so out of control! She gives new meaning to the term 'Baby Einstein'.

Wyatt pointing to the dumb fan in the middle of playing with daddy.

Monkey trying on his new hat for next winter!

A picture of my first born just because I couldn't resist!