Happy 1st Birthday! We love you so much!

Ladies and Gentlemen... we have ourselves a walker!

Callie took her first steps tonight!!!! I can't believe I'm even typing this! There she was, standing up all by herself and with a little encouragement, she took three... perfect... steps!

Brent thinks that she would have gone further had I been sitting a little further away, but as it was, I had to refrain from scooping her up after ONE step and showering her with annoyingly high-pitched praise and kisses!

I can't believe she did it! Very surreal! What a mother of a milestone too! ONE day before she turns one year old!

Of course, we quicky grabbed the video camera and tried to get her to do it again, but miss thang wasn't having it! Infact, she wasn't even willing to stand up at all anymore! Attitude.

Anyway, this was a picture of what she looked like tonight after all attemps at getting a replay had failed. What a beeg peencess!

Girlfriend needs a weave!

Hey peeps! The kids have been trouble the last couple of days. Both of them are teething and just horribly cranky. Today, when Callie woke up from her nap, I creeped up into her bedroom and laid down in her crib with her for awhile. It was fun because we played peek-a-boo under her blanket and that chick just about fell out when I tricked her and peeked at her hiding under the blanket! She was rolling! Then, I sang her the itsy bitsy spider and she clapped for me when I was done! I had to choke back the tears because she was literally the best audience I've ever dreamed of!

In word lingo, Callie is saying the word kitty, only it comes out like, "key". But she's got it down! Both kids are starting to understand us a lot better. Today I gently told Wyatt not to crawl into the bathroom, and he didn't! He turned right around! However, with every little accomplishment they make, I'm saying goodbye to my teeny tinnies!

I am crazy in love with these lil' runts! What an unbelievable journey I'm on and one that I am oh-so-grateful for! I think my heart could just explode some days!

Cal, in need of Wyatt's do-rag!

Pebbles Flintstone

Orphan Annie and her best sexy smile...

Thuggish Ruggish Hambone

Uncle Binky is in town! He got here on Thursday night and will be here for 10 days. I hate how his visits are so few and far between but at least when he comes it's for a week or longer. He's here to celebrate the babies turning 1! Callie likes to grab for all beer bottles and yesterday, when she tried to grab Brandon's, he told her that she needed to wait 20 more years before she was allowed to have one. 20 YEARS!!!! I suddenly realized the huge age difference between us and the kids and how old that makes me feel! I guess that we really weren't kids just yesterday!

Anyway, here are some pictures of Wyatt in his new "Do-Rag For the Lil' Brotha". Also, I know he was late at it, but Monkey finally waved! I grabbed the camera and was able to get him to do it again. Oh! One last thing... click here to see why Furman has a blurb on TMZ. I appreciate that neither one of those mofos was given Timmons!

Getting close!

Cal Bear is soooo close to walking. We put them both up against the wall and they did really well with just standing there. They never toppled over. We tried to get them to walk to us, and that crazy Monkey left his feet against the wall and just fell face-first as if he was playing the trust game like a bad ass.

Callie just stood there like, "No Momma. Today is not my day to walk." Instead she just clapped her little hands because we were doting over them like crazy people at the two of them standing there all by themselves.

Two little ditties

THIS IS WHY I LOVE SAM'S CLUB! They have twink carts!

Also, if you are a parent, or anyone who has ever loved a child, this is such a beautifully written post that completely choked up both me and Brent. Enjoy!

Click here to read "Hands"

Leedles and Loddies

In Callie's world, everything is classified as either a "leedle" or a "loddy". I have been trying to decipher what the terms of classification are, but I still haven't come up with a single idea. Her play table, her Grover puppet, and any kind of printing on HER shirt are always "leedles". Daddy, the dogs, and any printing on anyone else's shirt are always "loddies". Everything else is a "leedle" or a "loddy" according to her whim. It's so funny. She loves nodding her head yes and hopes that you will join in the fun. She will also let you know when you have something in your hand that she thinks you need to shake by making a shaking gesture (i.e. car keys, water bottles, peekablocks...). She's a doll face. She loves saying "yeah!" when she is approving of something or if something is making her happy. She says "hi" and "bye" on the regular and loves waving to people or animals or muppets that she likes. She loves the Teletubbies... specifically the sun. Oh! She also started clapping today.

Monk-tey is still content with his only word, "momma". I love it so much when he crawls up to me for a hug and as he is clinging to me like his life depended on it, he will say "momma" so softly. It makes my heart melt. Appropriately, monkey likes to nod his head no... so when Callie starts nodding her head yes, Wyatt will look at her and nod his head no. I'm sure this is just a glimpse into the non-cooperative future. He HATES waking up... he needs a minute to adjust. And he really loves chick-ten (chicken).

Watching the kids play and learn is the most unbelievable and amazing thing that I have seen. It's just beautiful to watch them discover the world and knowing that I am a part of their life just makes me feel like life is so beyond what I ever thought it could be. I know they don't understand me, but I tell them all the time that they have made my life a dream come true and fulfilled me as a human being.

Our First Birthday Surprise!!!!

Today the FedEx dude brought the twinks their very first birthday present from my friend Yolanda! She's the greatest! I needed that surprise like no one's business. I think that Brent and I were almost as excited about it as the babes. It was this really cute little Leap Frog table and they played with it almost all day. The woman who sings the ABC's when you push the right button thinks she's Mariah Carey! She belts out the alphabet with some freaking vibrato and voice quiverage like the kids give a crap. It's hilarious!

Thanks Yola!!!! I love you so much and it meant the world to me! The kids totally loved it! I can't wait to see you in June!

My Favorite Reject of All Time!

Wow! When Brent goes out of town, it's always a challenge - and I'm usually up for flexing my power-mom muscles, but he's really only "barely" out of town this week and last night I ended up in the fetal position just shy of pulling another Britney and shaving my head or some other crazy crap like that!

It wasn't even really a single incident that cracked me either. Although, Wyatt peeing all over me didn't really help. I had friends over too and while that usually would have helped me, it just embarrassed me knowing that other people were watching me fall apart at the seams.

Especially when those other people are looking forward to becoming mothers themselves!

Some days, I feel like we are a walking advertisement for birth control and while I'm cool with having poop all over my hands, puke on the carpet, and a house that smells like one big dirty diaper... I'm sure other people who aren't used to that kind of thing breathe a deep sigh of relief the second they walk out the door.

Whatever.

Today, I didn't think I was going to make it by myself and thank the lord that my mom lives close enough to help... because she did... and saved me from flipping out.

But, I made it and I'm so excited too because American Idol starts tonight!

And I get to watch it with a full head of hair!

Weekend Pics

I pulled a Britney.

We had our first accident today. And it's definitely not something I want to shout from the rooftops, but there is really no hiding a baby with a shiner. That's right... girlfriend got a shiner! I was stripped of my crown and my "Best Mother Ever" title late this morning. I feel worse than awful and have been wallowing in my incompetence ever since.

I was making the kids lunch in the kitchen when I overheard them laughing rottenly. It was the unmistakable laugh that lets you know they are up to no good. Which, usually I'm cool with because... well... at least they ain't screaming. But, at the same time, I realized that the laughter seemed kind of soft and distant... distant like UPSTAIRS distant! I swear that I pulled out some crouching-tiger-hidden-dragon-crap as I flew to the foyer only to see girlfriend FALLING DOWN THE STAIRS!

Oh. My. God.

I'm getting shaking legs just reliving the moment. Thankfully (and I mean, counting every single one of those lucky stars), I caught her mid-flight and she never hit the tile floor. THEN, I had to quickly grab her and make sure she was still alive and in one piece and scurry up the rest of the stairs to shield Wyatt from a fall!

Those two little runts had torn down the baby gate and had somehow managed to quickly scale their way to the top! I guess Monkey made it and Cal was a little less fortunate. Poor thing! I have been apologizing to that child all day and that damn shiner is a constant reminder of my bad parenting skills. It's like salt in a freaking wound! And now I just have this obnoxious and intrusive mantra running through my head... 'I'm a bad mom. I'm a bad mom. I'm a bad mom.' I've been in a boxing match with myself about it all day.

Needless to say, I spent the afternoon looking online for baby gates that screw into the wall.

My tastebuds done broke!

So today, I very lovingly cooked my man a crock pot dinner while his hairy self was at work. It was a Thai dish and holy-to-the-youknowwhat it was good!!!! I mean, I even called my girlfriend and told her how good this crap tasted and smugly felt like my inner chef was finally starting to blossom. Move over freaking Julia Child!

Well...

Homeboy came home and I jokingly told him that he should have brought home take-out because I screwed up dinner. (Even though I knew fully well that he was going to taste one scrumptious bite of this meal and buckle at the knees in ecstasy.) I continued with my evil plan as I suggested we feed it to the dogs because it was simply inedible. I grabbed a spoon and arranged the perfect bite... a piece of chicken, rice, a pepper...

When he tasted it, I was already preparing myself for the stream of profanity that was going to come out of his mouth because there are simply NO OTHER WORDS to describe such deliciousness!!!! All the while, I'm trying to hold back my huge grin.

But he agreed with me!!!! Oh my gosh! I was karate-kicked the hell off my pedestal and simply crumbled into the fetal position.

Needless to say, I feel like deleting all my previous recipe posts! Hahaha! You should have seen him try to pull his foot out of his mouth! There was no budging it though... the damage was done. All I could do was laugh.

At myself.

But, on a happy note, it's National Bubble Bath Day!!!! I kid you not! I saw it on the American Greetings website. So, in honor, I leave you with these...

First though!!!! I wanted to tell you all that girlfriend brushed her hair today!!!! I mean, I wasn't even in the same room! She found the brush and while she was watching TV, she brushed her hair! Oh my gosh!!!! I died and went to girlfriend heaven!

Playing with Dad

"Did you all dress up as.... hookers?"

So... it's time to play catch up and I've been procrastinating because the holidays went by so quickly in such a blur that it's going to take serious effort to recount what all happened. Here goes...

Christmas was great. We spent it at my parent's house amongst the moving boxes with lots of family. We didn't get started until about 1:00 in the afternoon because I was trying so hard to get the kids napped up and ready to go. But they were completely overwhelmed with everything going on and got really cranky pretty quick. To be honest, I think that Brent and I might have set our expectations a little too high with how we thought the kids were going to react to everything. It actually took a couple of days for the kids to open all their presents and even then, they were really only interested in ripping the paper and eating it. Precious.

New Years was TOO much fun! Stigalicious Aunt Zippy came to visit us and the kids and we really just had tons of fun together dorking off. We hadn't seen her in way too long so the visit was way too short. It was sad when she left and the kids really did love playing with her too. Thankfully, we only have to wait a couple of weeks before we get to see her again. That girl can make me laugh until I pee! She's family.

New Years day was a hungover and sluggish daze. Still though, I found the energy to cook our traditional lucky dinner. As defined by the internets, this is why we eat the fatty goodness. The kids really liked it too! My mom, of course, makes those nasty oil balls that my brother and I used to dread having to eat when we were growing up.



Anyway, in milestone land, Callie has finally started saying "momma". She is a waving and dancing fiend (even to her mom's horrible-american-idol-outtakish voice)! She's even been able to stand on her own for a few seconds without holding onto anything! We are about to be totally screwed once the two of them start toddling! Wyatt is in love with this little riding car and is obsessed with trying to figure out how to use his legs to scoot the car. For now, he's content with daddy pushing him around on it.



Well, I apologize for the novel. I hope that your holidays were as good as ours and we wish everyone a happy and healthy New Year!

P.S. - I almost forgot! I just wanted to give an appreciative shout out to my anonymous commenters, one specifically named "G", the mystery kisser "M", and of course my favorite commenter ever... Richie!

Happy New Year 2008!

Christmas Professionals

Babies' First Christmas!

You know you have problems when you can run the dust buster's battery dead in one day. Everyday.

I think I just need to surrender to the filth. It's everywhere. It sticks to everything and is dried up and crustified on everything else. I think there is enough food on my kitchen floor to feed a starving family. We are never out of cheerios even if the box is empty. There is enough in the couch, in the car, in my hair, and on the counter to stock Walmart. If you're ever lost on the way to my house, just look for the one with swarms of flies and thick green fog looming over it. I'm surprised CSI hasn't come to make sure that the stank isn't coming from rotting corpses.

Not to forget all the bruises. I think I'm missing something concerning Mommy 101. Good news though, none of us are rabid yet.

On the other hand, my girlfriend is serious about her booty shaking. I can't even explain to you how in love with this kid I am. And I realize that it's only because I'm her momma, but I've never seen anything cuter in my entire life! I'm serious... no one needs to get me anything for Christmas. I'm good. Sometimes I feel so happy that it makes me nervous...almost like it's too good to be true. 2007? Best year ever... stank and all!!!!!!

Opening up their very first presents!

Christmas Tour of Homes '07

Okay... so I've decided to try and participate in this "Christmas Tour of Homes" even though 1.) I have no idea how this thing is going to work, and 2.) I'm really not sure exactly how I'm supposed to participate since the directions are so vague. Basically (I think), you post several cute Christmas pictures and people blog hop to a bunch of different blogs to see other people's Christmassy things. The soup thing was kind of fun so I'm interested to see how this one turns out as well. Here are my contributions to the tour of homes...

(Oh yeah... If you are interested in getting peeks into other people's houses, just click on the tour of homes button and it should take you to a list of plenty of them.) I apologize in advance if this whole thing is ridiculously cheesy... I have no idea what it's going to be like!